there she goes

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're Doing Something. So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody's ever made before. Don't freeze, don't stop, don't worry that it isn't good enough, or it isn't perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you're scared of doing, Do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever. Neil Gaiman #happynewyear2017 #artsy #whatalongpost #alhamdulillah #reflection #typic

A photo posted by Hasniza Hisma (@hasnizahisma) on Dec 31, 2016 at 10:24pm PST

happy new year 2017

so i'd like to jot down a few lines on the first page of 2017's book. haven't really into this tradition of making the first day of january such a celebration since the past few years, because to me it's just another day and just happens to be the first one. yes i used to blog 'happy new year 20XX' and blah blah, that's all.

i just felt a bit different this year. was it because most people on facebook that i know celebrated new year and posted something online? or maybe because i've secretly declared that i wanted to be more active on social media which prompted me to join the bandwagon, i think so too..

last night, we went out for a dinner as aaqilah repeatedly mentioned we should go to see fireworks, or at least be at somewhere happenings because it's new year. we just told her that was something we haven't done in years. it's almost sounded like a pleading, at least we should go to citta mall she said. since natalia and apparently sufi too were having a mild diarrhea hence we decided it's better not to divert anywhere after dinner. too bad no fireworks display could be seen from subang bestari.

so i thought, it's not really about the first day of january or the moment 12 midnight struck but at least i wanted to give them the feel and opportunity being at those busy places once in a while. probably celebrating new year will be one of those that they'll remember experiencing when they're kids. ain't that something nice to have?

let's start one shall we, i'll post any celebration photos next time on social media, be it on instagram or fb or my own blog :)

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're Doing Something. So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody's ever made before. Don't freeze, don't stop, don't worry that it isn't good enough, or it isn't perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you're scared of doing, Do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.” ― Neil Gaiman

It's been a while, and here we meet again in the month of december 2016. there's only 1 song and will always be associated with my december. don't know why but it's like december anthem, very melancholic and bit hopeful..

where do i begin after on hiatus for more than 2 years. a break which i initially thought for days or weeks, and it became 2 years? life and routines have finally caught up with us, and blogging was no longer a must. last post featured a 9 month old sufi and she's turning 3 in a month. aaqilah is already a big 10 year old, natalia now 7 is the one who enjoys school so much.

Bila maa tetiba semangat nak test skill photography 😅😝 #wonderingaaqilah #asknatalia #wisesufi #girls

A photo posted by Hasniza Hisma (@hasnizahisma) on Nov 26, 2016 at 3:49am PST

The other day at one of the best places serves masakan noghori 😋 #dinner #nilai #masakannoghori

A photo posted by Hasniza Hisma (@hasnizahisma) on Dec 1, 2016 at 12:18am PST

i've got so many to share here but let me start all over again slowly and steadily, i hope.

bismillah, here for another journey

You are your own product.

I've read it somewhere, but it didn't really struck me until I heard on radio this morning. The fact that Sarimah the deejay completed her degree, got her martial arts thingy which I think on instructor level, she's also a pilates instructor certified etc etc made me realized that there's so much more in the world that you can learn, invest, be good at and make a living, who knows.

I am an IT person. People may say that I could do other part time IT stuffs such as website, coding, hard core programming but for me IT is my main source of income aka 9-6 job at the moment. Coming back home I have three kids to attend, and after dinner either I cook or buy from kedai, all energy left is for putting Sufi to sleep. Laptop is left untouched beside me. No more codes or even games which I could bear to stare at, not even lay my fingers on.

What else apart from IT skills? I guess I have baking. Baking is my other passion, but to be honest I can't stand baking 24-7 too. I learn baking from books (when you buy there some investments), youtube and by experiments since young. I went to classes as well but couldn't afford to go many, so I'm a bit picky about which ones is more suitable to attend. Some skills you need learn from a master, some you can train and build over time. Alhamdulillah so far baking is part of my financial aids and one of my future investments.

However, I have started to obsess with exercises and work-outs such as yoga, zumba and cardio classes quite recently. i still swim whenever i can. I've started yoga in 2011 and was pretty amazed at my own capability. I really liked zumba when I first went to the class until I thought I should be a zumba instructor in order to do zumba like everyday hahaha but where do i begin to get certified? whenever i see new shoplots area, i thought, what if i invested in a studio? not only that you lead a healthy lifestyle but probably you'll have more time to roam free :)

the other skill that i've always dreamed long time ago is learning foreign language. not only learning but i want to be fluent and able to converse like speaking english. back then when taking japanese during uni days, i did well and really enjoyed the whole experience. for me, learning new languages is way easier than computer languages hahahaha many years ago, i used to self-taught myself basic french and italians which i demonstrated in front of o.h and left him in awe. such a joy and victorious! when taking classes, it's a commitment but a good opportunity to meet people and build network.

as i am listing down the mentioned above, funds and time won't allow me to achieve all at once. but i guess i can do one by one, by setting up a short-term goal. at least until end of the year, i should be able do this or at a certain level of something. more realistic and manageable put less pressure on myself hence they're doable. the most important thing is to never give up and never think that it's too late for everything. there's always a start for something to begin.

pray hard and work smart, insyaAllah. later play hard :)

Day 06 A taste of spring/autumn
I will always love you, and make sure that you'll be in safe keep babe hahaha



Day 07 Where I'd rather be
Apparently I've had the birthday dinner at the same place as last year, and probably in the coming years since the choice is mine.


Day 08 Hobby
Apart from dslr and instax camera which is the latest member to my photography clan, personally I think iPhone camera takes quite stunning photos :)


Day 09 Dark
It's actually the liquid electric repeller.


Day 10 My fave part of the day
Auwww seeing sufi smiles the very first thing in the morning wakes you up instantly. Stronger than coffee :)
 

Day01 Something purple
Day02 In my hand
Day03 Shapes

Day04 Good together

Day05 Not mine

quoted from my instagram,

I wasn't really on a particular colour but I just loved the fabric and it happened to be purple for my husband's reception.
After nearly 9 years and 3 daughters 

He still can fit in the baju melayu, but i need to shed some pounds here and there to get back in that kebaya shape haha although that kebaya was tailored a bit loose than my actual measurements.

ok, next.. 2nd day, keep on posting ;)

my mother sent my siblings and i to our quranic reading class near our house when we were young. very near that we only walked to the class and once in a while we ran in order to arrive at earliest.

i still remembered that there was a weekly fardhu ain class, where we had tazkirah sessions and solat berjemaah after that. in one of the classes i was introduced to yusuf islam or previously known as cat steven. my ustazah told us about his journey story embracing islam, and we learnt to sing his song. all i could recall was the first few lines something like these..

A' is for Allah, nothing but Allah
Ba' is the beginning of bismillah
...

when aaqilah was around a year or something, i was suddenly heard that song playing in my mind. i thought since i was in uk, it'd be easier to get the cd. so i was searching for that particular cd on amazon uk, and finally bought one based on the reviews that i've read about it. why i just didn't google the lyric back then.. duh.. ironically the imported cd was all the way from malaysia.

i didn't find the same song in the cd, but my kids really enjoy most of the songs until now. even they have their favourite playlist and make me play them over and over again. from aaqilah, to natalia and will be passing to sufi one day..

recommended =)

It's Aaqilah's first day at new school. I was worried before because she's never been alone in a new environment setting since she went to kindergarden with her cousin. Alhamdulillah, she adjusted well and seems to love the school. Even maa and ayah need to readjust to her new time table =)

During her first week starting school. FYI this is her first time being sent away to a place totally strange to her. Proud of you Natalia for adjustting yourself within the first 2 weeks, yeayy!! It's like a rollercoaster ride with Natalia and school and I think she quite enjoys herself there.

Aaqilah has started her swimming lesson this year, haaa this pic is not so related. If I could, I wanted to send them to many kind of classes but I guess that can be quite ambitious for parents. If you ask o.h, he'll simply reply, let them kid be kids. Ok one class at a time and it fits Aaqilah and her adventurous nature. Unlike Aaqilah, Natalia tu takut air la.

The most recent photo of us during a wedding trip in Kuantan. Look at the kids now, how time flies and growing up before your eyes makes me realise that us too have grown up a lot since their arrivals. Being parents teaches me a lot and there's still so many things to learn at the same time. I used to think that we started quite early (being parents at 26 was quite challenging hehe), but looking back at the journey we started nearly 8 years ago is such a humbling and grateful feelings. Seriously when I told o.h I wanted to get married at 25, I simply said without much considerations although I thought the idea is awesome. There and then I got the wish granted ;)

i don't know how the thrills and excitement of blogging went kaput.
it just stopped and that's it.

until today, when i was trying to recall something that i've posted before. there i have it and all of a sudden the excitement and thrills slowly came back. the blog looks clean, all thanks to the white background. although the font looks small, thank God i still have not much problem reading them.

since the last post, i've always felt that nothing much happened and to share. the list of readings has significantly decreased over the years. i wasn't interested in things anymore, i felt that work and family life have consumed most of my energy yang tak seberapa ni. the life itself has become routine, weekend is more like a commitment and to be honest, once in a while not really looking towards it.

sometimes the small things around you make the life much more appreciated and sweeter.

hey hasniza, welcome back and let's enjoy this ride again =)

december datang lagi..

macam baru je januari rasanya, tiba-tiba dah nak masuk tahun baru. alhamdulillah sebab punya kesempatan untuk welcome tahun baru, dan juga untuk a roller coaster ride of 2012. biasalah jalan tak semestinya lurus dan cantik macam highway, ada banyak simpang, roundabout, traffic light dan sebagainya. kadang-kadang sampai jalan mati dan kena buat 3 point turn dan patah balik. oh aku dan metafora, getting better gitu haha

jadi apa kita nak cerita pasal 2012 ni. alhamdulillah =) dari awal tahun aku ada la berazam secara agak hangat-hangat taik ayam supaya lebih produktif, lebih rajin dan lebih progresif. tak nak malas-malas sangat. nak belajar something yang baru.

somehow most of my wishes were answered. kadang-kadang kita tak sedar tapi apa yang kita nak dan doa secara diam dimakbulkan. mungkin not the exact wish tapi Allah itu maha besar dan maha mengetahui. dan selalunya apa kau dapat insyaAllah baiklah untuk kau, walaupun mungkin kita tak nampak hari ni. of course aku terus doakan plan yang lebih grand dan baik dari hari ini amin..

nampaknya 2012 started dengan perasaan agak demotivated. aku sebok mencari job baru. dan seperti biasalah aku ni, string of failures, macam sinonim. aku dapat interview kat company idaman, sampai dekat 2 jam, macam ada harapan dan of course aku berharap. tapi bila takde orang call esoknya atau lusanya dan juga sepanjang minggu, aku rasa another failure ni. lepas tu bila aku check kat sistem, walaupun as expected tapi sakit jugak ooo tengok terpampang depan mata, UNSUCCESSFUL status tu. pergh, makan dalam. lepas tu aku pon pasrah dan layan je. team ok, uk counterparts pon ok, tapi aku macam searching for something yang tak diketahui.

sangat tak tersangka akan dapat panggilan about a week after birthday. aku pergi dengan tak berharap pape, dan belasah aje dalam bahasa pasarnya. who knows, rezeki tu belongs to me. started the new journey in august, dan so far banyak benda nak kena belajar. yelah dah niat nak belajar sampai pandai kan. jangan give up dan sentiasa berusaha =) gambate!!

bandung, berlin and stavanger, woww very unexpected

after a while, i tend to forget how good and reliable i could be. dah lama aku rasa aku ni full of craps dan poyo. poyo poyo poyo. lazy bum. pathetic. sedeh. ah masih belum terlambat untuk melakukan sesuatu la.

harapan 2013 kita cerita dalam entri lain la ye. yang pasti miss aaqilah akan standard 1. hari tu aku cakap kat dia, aaqilah next year aaqilah standard 1. lepas tu darjah 6. then sekolah menengah, uni, kerja and nak kahwin. aaahh sedihnya maa.. dengan tersipu-sipu tak sure dia faham ke tak dia reply, apaa la maa ni..

a long december and there's reason to believe
maybe this year will be better than the last
i can't remember the last thing that you said as you were leaving
oh the days go by so fast

and it's been a long december and there's reason to believe
maybe this year will be better than the last
i can't remember all the times i tried to tell myself
to hold on to these moments as they pass 

p/s: esok nak melayan counting crows la hahaha

makeups are not compulsory, but they are like a necessity. i'm pretty sure that most women out there at least put on moisturizers and a pressed powder in handbags is a must.

a good article i stumbled upon this morning - heavy metals found in many cosmetics, not listed on labels.

it even listed a few products to have the highest levels of impurities, such as:

•  Clinique Stay True Makeup foundation (Stay Ivory) — arsenic, cadmium, beryllium, lead, nickel, thallium
• Sephora Sculpting Powder Trio eye shadow (Brown and Pink) — beryllium, lead, nickel, thallium
• MAC Sheerton Shimmer Blush (Springsheen) — beryllium, lead, nickel, thallium
• L'Oreal Bare Naturale mascara (Black/Brown) — arsenic, beryllium, cadmium, lead, nickel, thallium
• Cover Girl Perfect Point Plus eyeliner (Black Onyx) — beryllium, cadmium, lead, nickel
• Almay Intense i-color Trio eye color (Trio for Blues, Brown and Dark Grey) — beryllium, cadmium, lead, nickel, selenium
• Benefit Benetint Pocket Pal (Red Tint and Clear Gloss) — arsenic, beryllium, cadmium, lead, nickel, selenium, thallium

one interesting comment found in the article,

wish more women would work on being beautiful on the inside, a smile is a much prettier

works everytime and very cost effective =)

jodoh.

dengan siapa, macam mana, kenapa, di mana?

coincidentally tarikh dia hari ni plak, saya tak sengaja. btw draft berabuk ni dah nak sebulan. hari-hari aku duk ngadap skrin yang sama terkebil-kebil mencari idea. jodoh oh jodoh, rezeki oh rezeki.

bukankah sudah tersurat di loh mahfuz ketentuan jodoh, rezeki, dan maut itu. jadi setiap dari kita ni ada other halfnya insyaAllah. tapi takdelah sampai tak berusaha langsung, mentang-mentanglah dah tertulis. adakah jodoh ini takdir yang kita pilih sendiri, jika dia passes by, that moment and that person won't be coming back. macam tu ke. atau seperti yang aku pernah baca, if he/she's meant to be, he/she's meant to be..

marriage ialah relationship kan, jadi takde kuasa magik yang membuatkan semuanya smooth sailing. marriage/relationship needs hard work from both ends and never to give up. apa yang aku nak cuba relatekan dengan cerita di atas ialah macam ni, sila baca untuk beberapa perenggan berikutnya hahaha. kadang-kadang ada hari matahari bersinar terang gemilang, langit biru siap ada burung terbang bebas riang. ada hari gerimis. ada hari hujan lebat, siap ada petir guruh lengkap. ye, dia pelengkap, tapi once in a while aku pon bole naik darah jugak. sama-sama tensen dengan macam-macam peel masing-masing. ops, baru kawen nak masuk 7 tahun ni ;)

have you ever thought, why me? dah le pendek, tak putih (ok, tanak mengaku aku gelap di sini), kasar, tomboyish, tak manja, menggelabah ayam, train wreck, temperamental dan sebagainya. on the other hand, dia adalah sebaliknya. physically attractive, berjaya, high self-esteem, ciri-ciri berjaya.

dia pernah cakap, awak cool. oh seriously kembang kuncup hidung aku bangga time tu. hati rasa bunga-bunga ria. jadi ada 1001 macam sebab kenapa aku dan dia. kalau nak list down mau berapa jam lagi aku tetap mengadap skrin ni memikirkan jawapannya. ultimately ialah saya jodoh awak dan awak jodoh saya. 

aku berdoa untuk lelaki yang baik, bukan setakat dia baik tapi baik hatinya. aku suka lelaki yang pandai, ye sangat pandai. aku ni macam keretapi tanah melayu dan dia macam shinkansen. aku suka lelaki yang ada ilmu dunia dan agama di dada, alhamdulillah dia punya. aku nak rasa sangat selesa, the comfy cushion physically and emotionally. aku suka lelaki yang sedap di pandang mata. despite whatever people used to say that he's too pretty, dia as a person came top on my list. that's the magic i guess, somehow the obvious appearance becomes unnoticeable. (told you, the list keeps going)

rupanya lambakan bunga, coklat, heart shaped balloons and v-day deco kat sunway pyramid tadi berjaya jugaklah menjadikan aku orang jiwa-jiwa malam ni. aiiii...

Five 8's to practice:

1. stop eating when 80% full
2. eat dinner before 8pm
3. drink 8 glasses of water a day
4. get 8 hours of sleep
5. take 8,000 steps a day

ok, kali ni entri yang aku malas nak fikir dan simply type saja. is that possible?

dengan tak semena-mena aku cuba untuk ada entri just before 2012, tapi sebab layan tv dan budak-budak manja ni, tak sempat. dapatla 12.00 am on the dot. tak dapatlah date 31.12.2011. that's fine. sebab aku fikir aku akan the next 24 hours untuk coming up with a new entry serba semangat on the 1st jan. haha nil too

2011, nothing much happened. wasn's as tough and challenging as 2010, but picked up really slow. tatau camne nak cakap, but i sense something better this year? ameen and insyaAllah =)

o.h masih kuat semangat mengejar cita-cita baru as a pro golfer. aku masih lagi rasa stuck. sungguh tak best. stuck tang mana, mengapa, kenapa, pasal apa? aku pun stuck dengan jawapan yang still beneath surface. simply because, aku kurang bersyukur dengan kehidupan yang serba ada ni. whining, bitching and complaining, all the time. jadi, all the negativities only make you feel like sh7t.

tahun baru islam masih tak sampai 2 bulan. dengan kedatangan tahun baru 2012 ni, semoga semangat berkobar-kobar yang datang ni lebih membuatkan tak lupa pada the old hasniza. when she's 12, 15, or 21. probably the carefree 25. ok itu sekadar umur. kesimpulannya, di manakah hasniza yang ambitious, driven dan penuh daya imaginasi tinggi itu?

1st, bersyukur dari hati yang ikhlas dan humble, di atas segala nikmat dan apa yang kita ada sehingga kini. o.h the husband, the man and the best friend. a.a.i and n.a.a. syukur alhamdulillah kerana mak semakin kuat dan sihat, syukur untuk kesihatan yang terbaik dan keluarga besar tersayang. kesihatan yang baik, that's priceless. jadi mari kita teruskan dengan kesyukuran ini insyaAllah.

aku pernah terbaca somewhere,  apa yang Allah tunaikan untuk kita kerana Dia maha mengetahui apa yang terbaik untuk kita walaupun kita fikirkan/mahukan sebaliknya. mungkin kita tak sedar sekarang, kan. bila difikir-fikir balik, alhamdulillah apa yang aku pernah niat, hajat dan doakan, somehow granted, walaupun dalam keadaan sengaja dan tak sengaja.

alhamdulillah..

Intentionally my next destination after putrajaya was tasik titiwangsa.

if you're not really familiar with putrajaya ringroads and puzzle about getting to other places from putrajaya, just drive by following KUALA LUMPUR signage (it's a basic knowledge right). as in my case, i was going to kl and got oddly confused with the blue and green KUALA LUMPUR  signage. all i wanted was to get to mex with no hassles.

so, if you're having the same issue as i was yesterday in finding your way to mex, just follow the green KUALA LUMPUR. if it says KUALA LUMPUR - PLUS, i can assure that you're taking the right exits. what i wasn't sure was how far it took me from precint 4 to the mex exit.

only when you do it on your own that makes you value the hardship of driving.

p/s: the power of blogging - what about that? i'll post soon aight =)

it's hard to get back to blogging after so long.

kata o.h, blogging is dead. sekarang orang nak mengupdate sesuatu sangat senang, dengan adanya facebook, twitter dan bermacam-macam lagi social networking tools yang ada di dunia yang canggih ni. super ringkas dan super padat. orang macam aku yang layan tulis benda yang berjela-jela ni rasa, susahnya nak put into few words. sementelah broadband ni tak free, jadi maka baiklah kita menggunakan semaksima mungkin. mungkin ada orang yang masih sudi membaca tulisan panjang berjela ;)

yes, i come to realize that my extra time yang tak seberapa itu is much more needed by other people. probably kalau aku punya teknologi canggih seperti ipad (thank you steve jobs) pon belum tentu aku akan sentiasa berblog. blogging yang aku sudah ulang kali cakap, satu terapi yang sangat bagus, bila idea itu datang tanpa henti.

ada satu part dalam komik doraemon bila nobita kena menulis dan kasi alasan yang alangkah bagusnya kalau ada tool yang boleh menulis direct dari apa yang kita fikirkan. wah kalau macam tu memang aku boleh menulis 10 kali sehari, strongly proves that i think a lot inside. tak bagus, sebab punya tendency untuk mendatangkan headache dan heartache. tapi at least aku tak buat dosa free hahaha

ye, pagi ni seumpama satu kejutan dan entah kenapa aku rasa sedih pulak walhal takde kaitan langsung. mungkin sebab apple impress me so much for its clean design and the simplicity concept. neither over the top nor pretentious. kata julia child, simple doesn't mean that it easy. kata o.h once you go mac, you'll never go back.

permulaan yang decent dari saya ;)

ciao and salam

salah satu hasil dari kelas bersilat or formally knows as self defense class, can refer here

ada 5 orang awarded with certificate dari sesi yang lepas, 4 je dapat attended and salah seorang ialah yours truly. kali ni kita bergambar dengan sesi terbaru june - august. far right ialah our instructor. excited tak muka aku hahaha

intructor : bila nak datang kelas?

me: is this the 3rd class? err.. soon hopefully

wah, selamba aku memberi janji-janji mungkin palsu. bukan taknak, sebetulnya memang aku berminat dan sangat enjoy tapi kadang-kadang tu ada rasa malas sikit ;)

dalam gambar last tu, i already forgave myself for accidentally being in sleeping mode. haish.. sapalah amek gambar ni?

happy birthday jacky (chan)
tanti auguri marco ( delvecchio)

happy birthday to you people

very thoughtful and selfless :)

p/s: many many many many many many many thanksssss